Sunday, December 20, 2009

Running

If I had a fast car, I would drive away. I would manuver all the s-bends in the road, and I would floor the gas pedal along the highways. I'd like to feel the roar of a lamborghini beneath me, or the feel of a Harley between my legs. I would run.


                                    It's not like i'm afraid of telling you the truth. No, that's not it. I know you can handle the truth. It's that I don't trust myself around you when you know the truth
It scares me, so strange part of me is frightened by you knowing
All the indepth stuff about myself. Have you ever thought someone
so trusting could be so protective of herself

I know it sounds crazy, trust me, I see crazy all the time
Maybe I am crazy, i've wondered it for many years by now
But I can't be, I'd be hospitalized.

But I know you'd never betray me, so why
Why am I so scared that you're going to let me fall
let me shatter in a million pieces. Why am I running from you?
It's because the roads more travelled seem a hell of a lot less
scary than the ones that I travel with you.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Hmm

You don't even know how you make me feel
You make me think, yet you make me real
I'm glad I can be me
But the one thing that scares me
Is I trust you with everything
My life,
My secrets,
Everything there is to know about me,
I trust you with
Everything about you,
I trust you with.
That must mean something,
Maybe it means that I love you
But you wouldn't noticed me,
I'm just the girl you lend your hoodie to
Or put your hands on my face and look into my eyes.
I'm just the girl you joke about warming up,
Or putting your arm on top of mine,
Just to show me how warm you are.
But somewhere in there
amongst the hugs and the eye contact in the halls
I know I'm the only one you trust
And I take that to heart

Guess what, I'll never be good enough
I don't do anything right
I never look good enough
And I make dumb mistakes
I want you to love me the way I am
But sometimes it gets harder and harder
It's like I can't breathe
Like you're smothering me.
I know it's not your fault
You couldn't have known
But it gets harder every time
Sorry Dad

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Life

There's so much time left to figure this out, but already you've got me going insane

It seems you've noticed me
Finally
But I still don't know
If you feel the same way
So I'm scared to tell you who I miss
When obviously it's you
Love;
Me